Perfect title, eh? Eh? Anyway, let’s do some of these.
“Knock knock.”
“Who? Wait, what’s my line?”
text1: When are you coming home for winter break?
text2: You can say Christmas break. You’re among friends here.
text1: Indeed, but the break includes more than just Christmas. New Year’s is also celebrated during that time, as is, for some, Martin Luther King Jr. Day.
text2: Martin Luther Who Day? He doesn’t count.
text1: …you’re excluding him because he’s black, aren’t you?
“Well, in any case, I think I’ll go raise my IQ and watch Mean Girls again.”
text1: what I said makes perfect sense.
text2: I’ll look it over in the morning
text1: you’ll look it over i the morning. do you save these or something? stalker.
text2: It’s saved IN MY MIND
text1: well if that isn’t the creepiest
“‘Walk this Way’ was done originally by Aerosmith themselves, it wasn’t until later when they re-did it with DMX.”
“DMX…really?”
“DMC, my bad. Wow that was a horrible mix-up.”
“DMX, isn’t that a kind of bike?”
text1: so, sleep tight…good night.
text1: let the bed bugs bite.
text1: Another solid quote from my xanga…
text1: “People that drive around in parking lots are stupid.”
text1: I just threatened to light someone’s vagina on fire
text2: I love you more than pancakes
“Got a problem with that? Wanna take this outside and fart about it?”
text1: Ha! Then I guess you learned a lesson about ever expecting better from me!
text1: Or really ever expecting anything at all from me.
text1: Oh God I’m such a disappointment.
text2: You’re just like Christmas.